I wonder how much more I’ll have to take in order to be okay
Mixed media collage with prescription packaging inserts, old journal paper, and handmade paper, 10.5"x8.5", 2024
2.11.22
My mind is on the run
Running away from me and
What I truly believe
My mind is never at ease
It fights to take the lead
And my heart hurts
Because I still haven’t learned
To give it a voice
It feels like a relapse
When I retract and
I’m screaming on the inside
Clawing at my skin
Banging on the walls within my brain
A headache
I’m tired
Had 10 hours and I still show up late
Sleep can’t cure this feeling
My blood is boiling
My head’s swelling
Can’t believe what I’ve been telling myself
Can’t look for it in anyone else
Can’t scream, can’t yell
I want to cry, it doesn’t help
I get hot, it’s heating up
Inside I try to hide
I Lost another life
Shed another skin
Down to my bones
I cry and moan
It’s uneasy in there
And I’m scared of it
Eating me alive
How can I put on a face
And be brave
When the pain is
Trying to put me in a grave